When Fanfiction Attacks
by TheNuttyAuthor
Summary: In which the Yu-Gi-Oh and Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's gangs discover fanfiction, specifically this website, and are fairly freaked out by seeing stories about them.


Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh or Yu-Gi-Oh 5Ds. I was not involved in its production, and I don't have the legal copyrights to it. This is a parody of different Yu-Gi-Oh and Yu-Gi-Oh 5Ds ships that make no sense to myself and my friend Storychan, and it is done for fan purposes only.

Author's note: You may like a ship that appears here. Please note that if your ship makes an appearance, it's because Storychan and I have chosen to parody it. Also, all the fics described and named are located on this website if you want to read them. I _had_ to read them for parody material. Fanart described is found on Google Images.

* * *

Yusei had decided to Google his name in hopes that his duels would be talked about by the media. The turbo duel circuit was big news for reporters, and Yusei wanted to build a name for himself as a duelist. Unfortunately, the top result for "Fudo Yusei" was a website that hosted fanfiction, something that Yusei was personally unfamiliar with. He didn't know why that was the top hit instead of the news about turbo dueling, but he clicked on the link anyway, thinking that he would find something useful.

"Oh god! Oh god no! Oh god my eyes!" Crow worried that Yusei had been hurt, or that something bad happened to him. He walked over in the general direction of Yusei's shouts. He found Yusei at the computer, staring in horror at a popular fanfiction website. Crow didn't know what made Yusei yell, but he worried that something bad had happened.

"Yusei, what's wrong?" he asked. Yusei turned to look at Crow, eyes wide in shock. He was breathing fast, nervously biting his lip.

"People are writing stories about _us_."

Crow grinned. "All right!"

Yusei shook his head. "Not all right. Somebody wrote _this_," he said, pointing to the computer screen. The story on the screen was entitled "A Valentine's Day To Remember," and it listed "Kingcrabshipping" as the pairing. Crow looked at the text in bold, which stated the story was yaoi, and shook his head.

"Yusei, that's yaoi. You're not gay, are you?"

With horror, Yusei shook his head. "No! I found this by accident!"

Crow sighed. "Okay. What's so bad about this yaoi that you were shouting 'oh god my eyes!' at the computer?"

"I was Googling my name to see if anything about my turbo duels had made the news. This story was the top result. It's probably an isolated incident, but some fan wrote about Jack and I. Together. As in, _romantically involved_. As in, it doesn't even bother to explain anything other than getting Jack and I into a couple. And we kiss in the story. Gross." And it was gross because Yusei and Jack were _rivals_. Yusei wasn't attracted to Jack. That would be like, he didn't know, him being attracted to another one of his duel opponents. Or being attracted to Carly. Not that Yusei had anything against Carly, but Carly had a thing for smirking rich boys like Jack Atlas.

Oh. So Yusei had Googled his name and found something that wasn't even close to his ideal. Crow knew that duelists sometimes had crazy fans, but he hadn't realized that Yusei had gotten any over the course of his duels. He knew _Jack _had them, but he didn't think Yusei was big enough to get any. But Yusei and Jack? Those two were dueling rivals!

"Yusei, if you were gay, would you be into Jack Atlas?"

"No! I'd be into a guy I was actually not rivals with! Someone who wasn't Jack Atlas and who I hadn't declared a dueling rivalry with!"

Crow didn't think the Yusei-Jack thing was that big of a deal, just some crazy fans who didn't get why rivals didn't often date, but once he started reading, he realized that this fan who wrote "A Valentine's Day To Remember" didn't have any insight into Jack's Yusei-related behavior. Immediately in the beginning of that fanfic, Jack was ranting to _Crow_ about how he didn't have any idea what to get Yusei for Valentine's Day. Then somehow Crow in the fanfic was throwing out girls' names and then after Jack said he wanted to get Yusei something for Valentine's Day, somehow neither of them could think of anything.

Of course, after that, Yusei had to walk in, and state that Aki and Carly were meeting them for some romantic Valentine's Day dinner. Then there was discussion of how Crow planned to get Jack to show Yusei that he liked him more than Aki did, and somehow on Valentine's Day, everyone's clothes were described.

The girls were all introduced and random accidents happened to some girl named Haruki, who apparently was introduced solely to cause awkwardness and the absence of Crow after the two ran out of the restaurant. After that, Carly was hopeful that Jack had something romantic to say to her. Then Jack and Aki both confessed to loving Yusei at the same time, and Carly was crying while Aki got possessive and angry at Jack. And predictably, in the end, Yusei and Jack got together.

"Wow. That's terrible," Crow said.

Yusei shuddered. "I hope that this is the only fanfic that exists which pairs me and Jack together. I don't think I can take it if there are any more of them."

Out of morbid curiosity, Yusei typed his name into the fanfiction site's search engine. "Oh, god. There's _more_," he groaned. He didn't know what sort of person thought that _rivalry_ was the basis for a romantic relationship. Even if Yusei and Jack _were_ gay, Yusei would be into a guy he was actually friendly with. Like Crow or Tank. And Jack? Yusei thought the same situation would happen with him.

Crow sighed. "I'll get Kiryu and call the others. We need a good laugh."

"It's _not funny_!"

"It kind of is."

"_Why_?"

"Come on. You and Jack are such big rivals, a relationship's impossible. Even if you two were gay. Or bi."

Yusei got up from the computer and scowled at it. "Let's let Kiryu pick the next horror," he grumbled. Kiryu would, most likely, pick something fairly twisted, but Yusei thought he could deal with that better than he could deal with anything trashing Aki or Carly.

True to his word, Crow did get Kiryu and the two were laughing uproariously over some fanart featuring Yusei and Jack. Yusei didn't look at The Fanart after the first picture, which showed Jack holding a blushing Yusei all bridal style. Ick. He couldn't believe that it made Kiryu laugh. Then everyone else came...something that Yusei had not been looking forward to. Aki was going to see the horror! And so was Carly!

Once everyone was there, Yusei announced, "Some duel circuit fans have been writing stories about me and Jack. Together. As a couple." Carly's eyes went wide with shock. Aki scowled. Kiryu and Crow just laughed because the pictures apparently were a source of such hilarity.

Jack walked over to the computer, sitting down and scowling. "Gather round. Let's see who's been misrepresenting our glorious rivalry." With a groan, he pulled up a fanfic entitled "King's Property." The story filled the screen, something that everyone had to look at.

"King's Property" involved Jack being jealous because some other boys were looking at Yusei, and then Yusei somehow decided that he and Jack were dating. At least, as far as everyone could tell. Then there was a kiss at the end between Jack and Yusei. Carly was in tears. Aki just scowled at Yusei.

"J-Jack..." Carly muttered. "You don't like me."

Aki snapped, "Yusei, you're an idiot!"

Jack groaned. "I'm not gay! And even if I were, I wouldn't be attracted to _Yusei_. Those stories assaulted my eyes!"

Yusei nodded in agreement.

Then Kiryu walked to the computer and pulled up a whole _website_ full of pictures of Jack and Yusei having sex. Kiryu was just grinning. "These are hilarious! Yusei's always on the bottom!"

Yusei and Jack looked at each other and made disgusted faces. Argh! Just because Yusei was younger and somewhat physically smaller than Jack didn't mean that he was some sort of...yaoi uke. He felt demeaned, like the fans who drew him _like that_ with his rival just saw Yusei as a weakling who couldn't win against Jack. He didn't know if this was the sick result of after a duel, if somehow Jack managed to...corner him and turn zhim into Yusei the Yaoi Uke, but he despised it. All of those pictures looked like Yusei was _enjoying_ it. And Yusei, for that matter, hadn't even had sex before. But he knew he'd prefer not being Yusei the Yaoi Uke. He also was pretty sure that Jack didn't want to be Jack the Yaoi Seme.

"It's not funny," Jack said. "What makes anyone think that I'd willingly have sex with Yusei without being blackmailed into it? And what makes those fans think that either of us would _enjoy_ it?"

"For once, I agree with Jack."

And, worse, Carly was still crying, and Aki looked like she was going to punch either one of the men involved if she didn't get an answer about who they liked.

"I'm not gay! I like Carly!" Jack cried.

Carly's eyes lit up and she jumped for joy, hugging Jack. "You like me! Yes! I knew it!"

Jack sighed and reluctantly returned the hug. "This is why I haven't told you before," he muttered. "You're...affectionate."

"And I like Aki!" Yusei blushed as he said that. Aki stared at him.

"Y-you do?" she asked, biting her lip as she looked at him. "This better not be a lie so that you can lead me on, ditch me, and date some guy who might be Jack, Fudo Yusei!"

"No! I really like you! And not Jack! And if I _did_ like guys, I wouldn't have led you on! I've got more integrity than that." Aki smiled.

The group exited the


End file.
